the moon isn't made of honey.

i have to admit, naming each post is nearly as exciting as the actual writing of any given post. my ears even seem to perk when a preacher says the name of his message, and i'm always disappointed when one of them will say; 'i don't like giving names to my messages.'

why?

it's all the rage, as they say. or said, more accurately...in the fifties.

i've realized something. i prefer and nearly always do, write out number amounts, rather than just punch it in with the number keys. and i use the number keys above the letter keys instead of the ten key pad, which really gets jeff's goat.

(note to self: return jeff's goat.)

i love the fact that i almost always set down in front of this computer with some sort of theme or story to put down in this little box. and yet, i rarely get to the meat of anything important. for example, or i.e., if you prefer. i wanted to write about being married and the wedding, the honeymoon. you know, things that matter. and yet, i open with jibber-jabber, as the now-preacher mr. t would say.

so i did indeed get married saturday. i was so unbelievably nervous that i couldn't possibly describe it to you and give it justice. i didn't eat all day, and only took one drink of water and one drink of tea - and that was just before the ceremony. jeff, kyle and myself took what seemed to be a thousand pictures, most of which were goofy and ridiculous. the word 'snoogans' was definitely the word of the nite, as we all said it hoping the others would laugh - and we did.

while sitting in a side room, waiting for the show to get on the proverbial road, jeff, kyle and i - namely kyle and i - sang random country songs. including, but not limited to, songs such as; 'country boy can survive' and 'God blessed the broken road'.

before i knew it, dale day, the minister, had led us in a prayer and we were walking to the stage. and then the bridal march began to play and i seemed to stop breathing from then on as i saw stephanie being walked down the aisle by her father. no, it wasn't a killer look in her father's eye that left me unable to work my lungs, but stephanie, in all her beauty that confounded my ability to take in air. as i told her as we stood there, i just didn't have the appropriate words to get across to her how unbelievably gorgeous she was at that moment. i mean, she looks beautiful to me in the morning when her hair is a mess and the make-up is long gone...but, wow, any previous time i said she was beautiful was made a lie when she appeared in her wedding dress. her beauty at that moment in time was a mystery to me and still is.

i cried.

hey, don't laugh, i didn't have to tell you. thankfully most of my tears came during a prayer, so no one actually saw the aforementioned crying.

we exited to, in my opinion atleast, the coolest exit music ever heard at a wedding. that's right, '500 miles' by the proclaimers. everyone laughed and thought it was well done.

afterwards we were showered with gifts and financial gains. i was even slipped a twenty dollar bill through the handshake of one of stephanie's uncles. that was surely the coolest way i've ever been given cash. i hope to do it myself someday.

we stayed at stephanie's house that nite, she was very tired. i was too, to be honest. the next day we left for branson, which is like a hollywood for the elderly. or what hollywood would've been had walt himself discovered it. we stayed at a holiday inn express in one of their king suites. it was alot nicer than i imagined. it had two bathrooms, two t.v.'s and a whirlpool tub. while in branson, we went on the 'ride the ducks' (which i'll refrain from speaking about now because it really does warrant it's own post.) and went on the branson showboat and saw an awesome show including singing, dancing and magic. all-in-all it was a pretty good time. we got back tuesday nite and had an argument.

what?

did you think honeymoons were perfect days filled with fun and laughter and nites flooding with endless romantic passion?

you apparently didn't read the name of this post.

did you?

the canadian-esque.

ever have your heart skip a beat? in that one instant you are forced to come to terms with your own mortality. the reality that one day, not very far off, your heart is going to completely stop pumping.


it really makes you think.

i have to admit that the above statement was from a draft that i began writing on 4.14.05. after reading jeff's second to last post i've been inspired, via by jeff's boldness and fortitude to 'man up', so to speak, or because of our shared shame of being to procrastination what hulk hogan and bret hart are to professional wrestling. i'm pretty sure it's the latter. whatever the case, lets get on with this...i really hate italics.

so...it's been a while, eh?

why do i write 'eh'? i don't say 'eh' in my everyday life, not even on some sort of secretive, self-holy, set-aside day in, let's say, late october, where i make it a point to showcase the candian-esque word.

and why do i write in long, how-be-it, really cool and humorous sounding stints? again, i don't talk like this.

maybe it's the 'filmmaker' thing. where every director shows you through his or her's movies how they see the world, or, more likely, would like to see it.

i wish i talked like that. i think i do, anyway. on a quick-ended second thought, i don't. because then you always have to talk like that.

and that is alot of pressure. i can't live up to those kind of expectations. i can't even pass academic seminar.

wow, it feels really good to be writing again. i just had to tell you. and by 'you' i mean jeff and any other unsuspecting fool who stumbles over this blog.

i'm getting married saturday.

yeah, me, married. who thought that was possible. a woman who will, soberly, and purposely want to enter into holy matrimony with me.

incase you haven't picked up on it yet, i'll let you in on a little secret.

ready?



i'm pessimistic.

i know, shocking.

i'm also quite sarcastic, apparently.

or just a prick.

you decide. or better yet, i'll just admit to it. no, not that i'm a prick, that i'm sarcastic.

wisenheimer.

like i said before, i'm getting married saturday. my good friends jeff sherry AKA robin williams and kyle williams AKA boomhower are coming in from the 'heart of it all', ohio, tomorrow. jeff will be driving, and be coming back for good, while kyle has chosen the easier, and smarter vehicle, of flying. of course, he leaves sunday morning.

i've given jeff the old 'AKA' of said actor and comedian, because their likenesses are strinkingly similar, especially when looking at the film 'good will hunting' where williams sports a well-grown beard.

unfortunately, that's where the similarities stop. williams is rich, talented and surely has a large bookshelf-like container hosting his many acting awards. but to be fair, jeff is way funnier than him.

as for kyle...well...he just looks and talks kinda like boomhower. yep.

my third, and final, groomsmen, patrick teal AKA mac donalds, resides in springfield, and even if he lived out-of-state, couldn't get here because of his car...or lack-there-of.

his 'AKA' derides from his pronunciation of the restaurant mcdonalds. he is from alabama, though, so cut him a break.

i'm extremely nervous about the aforementioned wedding. it's a big deal. it's not like you get married everyday. this is for good. for life. for keeps.

i think it's healthy to be nervous. and to be honest, i think there is something is every man, or in my case, boy, that fights to the very last second of existence to be free. unbound. unbridled. free as a bird...now. sorry. lynyrd skynyrd quotes are vital to the continuation of society. or the end of it. i guess we'll see.

although i've never liked the drama and risk and everything else that goes along with dating and meeting someone new, sometimes you just want to be able to hop in your car, or if you don't have a convertible and can't actually 'hop' in, or have a convertible and just feel it's foolish to 'hop' in, or more likely, you'd probably come up short and either fall onto the pavement and risk a tailbone injury or land precariously on the door itself...the point is, sometimes you just need to feel like you can do and go whatever and wherever you please, even if you wouldn't actually do or go anything or anywhere.

how's that for a run-on sentence?

stephanie is absolutely the one for me. the fact that i've known her for eight months and she still communicates to me, and not by means of restraining orders, is still to this day astounding to me.

the stress of planning the wedding. the cake, the decorations, the dress, the tuxes, the church, the every little microscopic detail...and my less than glowing and growing relationship between stephanie's mother and sister make things interesting, to say the least.

i'll just be glad when it's over. i know how grim and unwanting that sounds, but it's true. we're both so stressed right now that it defies simple logistics that one, or both of us, hasn't killed a person, or even a small animal, yet.

'yet' being the key-word.

without hopefully becoming a umteen-offense liar, i'll end with these words:

i think i'll start updating this blog reguarly.

i know what you're thinking.

"yeah right." eh?